Sex talk. I usually love to start my pen moments with you on an indirect and sensual level; today is not one of those days. Let me just cut to the chase. Lately, I have keenly observed how you lurk around monitoring my every moment; it’s time you find a hobby besides snooping around— to listen to my phone conversations, checking my call log, reading my WhatsApp convos and secretly body guarding me in town to see if i was having sex. I knew all along and purposed in my heart to fake ignorance.
It’s time I told you deeper things about myself that I never mentioned throughout the 12 months we dated. Bae, I can no longer continue this relationship. You’ll understand why I never had sex with you all this while by the time I’m done with this letter.
I recall all the fun and exciting times we shared during our many ‘awor shiaa’ sessions; for they were more than the stars God asked Abraham to count in the Bible. Lol. Surprisingly but intentionally, I wasted all those opportunities.
I’m breaking up with you because I love you enough not to look you in the eye and lie through my teeth that all is well. Frankly, all is not well.
Delete all I said. Let’s start with the truth about my biiiiiigggg problem. By problem, I don’t mean that I’m uncircumcised (kotibotor), a ‘one-minute man’, a man with a starved manhood, a greened-horned virgin or that I have any STDs. Far from that. I’m a real man who has had many conquests in the past. I have had sex many times with different sex partners.
Through an unplanned blood donation I did to support a colleague on admission some weeks back, I discovered I had SS genotype. The medical team were awed by how I lived all these years with the sickness and didn’t know knowing about it.
Baby, knowing first hand of the predicaments you face as a SS person, we needn’t any seer to tell us, particular for a fee, the future consequences of a union where our children, besides us, will constantly be pained and inconvenienced by our medical condition. My conscience won’t permit that.
As you read this letter, I am currently beyond your reach: I advise you don’t bother using your meagre salary tracking me. I repeat, please don’t bother trying. But in case you want to try, for reasons best known to you, I can only wish you well.
Sex free life
I have come to that stage where I have to erase myself from your life and set you free. Please find a loving man to marry and give birth to healthy children.
Please forgive my heartless move. Good bye my love.
Your friend,
Abenyin
About the Author
Hmmmmm. If it is true story then it is touching but if it is an iimaginative piece then I salute. I admire your prowess. You are a ggreat writer.
Wonderful. Wonderful. Wonderful piece. I was moved to believe this is a true story. Very touching. Big ups my guy. You do all. Very brilliant write up.
Ei Abenyin. Abi he dey go marry. Lol.
Waw what a touching story