Heart Matters: To Love Or Not To Love


Love is a big subject and equally complicated. Situations people go through make them perceive LOVE as either wicked, kind, indifferent, pure, or non-existent. Prepare your minds and hearts as we jointly delve into the many things we failed to realize about love.

Today, I serve you a analysis of how these love narrations relate to your situation or someone’s. I call this the mirror segment.

What is LOVE?

You may define LOVE as the desire to always be with that special person because you two are compactible. It is also that virtue within you that makes you whole-heartedly see pass a partner’s mistakes. Ok, let us try this other definition; “love is that mutual affection you share with a partner on a timeless base” (my buddies et al, 2011). Any3mi, let me hold on to these kolo definitions of love before I get some people bored, lol.

How well do we understand the love criteria we set for ourselves?

Usually, ‘who’ we fall in love with criteria we use in selecting our partners. That process determines whether a relationship will last or not. The part I enjoy most is hearing ladies telling their peers of the qualities they want in a man; they go like, “my man must be God fearing, hardworking, handsome, tall, kind, humble, and rich”. Ayekooooo!

Let me bring it home for you. If you say you want a hardworking partner, don’t complain when a workaholic, or an armed robber comes your way. Abi every hard work be hard work! And for those who want God fearing and humble partners, I don’t know what to even tell you.


What motivates lovers to choose person A over person B?

Human being naturally have peculiar traits like height, weight, skin colour, etc. It’s likely that that special thing you love about person A, other people have it too. So “what made you choose Kofi over Kwamena, or Sandra over Alberta?”


What are the risks involved in falling in the wrong hands?

When the relationship starts smoothly, you’ll hear“we are so compatible”, “my partner is there for me at all times”. Or, “(s)he makes me feel so special”, and “(s)he is my everything”. But when one party begins to feel indifferent, the once-happy relationship is about to end.

So I accidentally started gathering testimonies from friends to use for this post. One friend said: “I feel very cheated”. Another said, “all of a sudden I have lost connection with my partner. I have neither missed her nor called for over two months”. If you think that was worse, read this lamentation from another friend of mine. “I should have partitioned my heart to many guys rather than endure an ingrate of a boyfriend?” Hmmmmmmmmm, love matter.

Let me briefly touch on the risk involved in dating the wrong type before I lose my focus.

  • Bebi debi ebeyeyie group: They are optimistic of better days though things don’t look promising.
  • Fear factor: I overheard one lady say this to her other friends at a taxi rank. “As for me, I am so used to my man that I cannot imagine falling in love with another person. I can’t build trust for so long and start all over again with another person.

Are there obvious Love signs you do not need to be told?

There are certain red flags that should make you know whether the relationship has a future or not. Below is a list of tips I have gathered from friends’ experiences and reading.

1. (S)he tries to find problems with everything you do, or blames you falsely for everything.
2. (S)he usually makes excuses when you want to see him/ her or isolates him/herself from you.
3. (S)he starts giving you straight answers for a question that requires a longer answer.
4. You keep calling your partner and (s)he does not pick up or return your calls after hours or days.


To love or not to love

The ‘hold on’ guys say true love is hard to find and that those who find it should not expect it to be easy. Those who subscribe to the ‘letting go’ idea have also said that no normal human standing in a blast furnace should expect to come out alive, sound, and unhurt.

This is the portion where I suspend writing and make you finish the write-up for me. Make your voice heard loud and clear. Should we hold on or let go? Let me hear from you.

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